The Strolling Minstrel

2011-05-05T16:27:00.000-07:00

I should be writing my OT Exegesis Paper, but I'm too much of a slacker to do so. For those that know me, they know that I always work well under pressure (which is a nice way of saying I'm a procrastinator). Nevertheless, I thought I'd share what I am learning from this.

The passage that I've chosen to do my exegesis on is Ecclesiastes 5:1-7.

This is a passage that has drastically changed and is changing my prayer life. I use to say anything and everything to God in my prayers. After all, God is someone we should be open with about everything because we are in relationship with him if we follow him, right? However, this passage teaches me something completely different. It teaches me to choose my words wisely when I am in God's presence. That less just might be more in this situation.

But why would less be more? Why do words seem to matter so much? When I think of the answer to this question, it causes me to think about the people that have spoken the loudest to me in my life. The people that have done so are people that speak very little. Yet when they speak, they resonate the most because they are thought out well before they are said. Maybe this is true for our prayer lives. Maybe we should think out what we want to say before saying them to God.

The next thing that is taught is that if you make a vow to God, be quick to fulfill it. This is also stated earlier in Deuteronomy 23:21. It says it's better not to make a vow than to make a vow and break it. Jesus further adds to this in Matthew 5:33-37 with any commitment to anyone. When reading this, I began to realize how contrary this is to our culture. We frequently make promises we can't keep or as is said in the south "we write checks our butts can't cash." What this is saying to me that this is one of those calls where Christ calls us to be counter-cultural and for us to follow him and not the culture in this incident. We need to be men and women of our word.

The next part is what struck me the most. According to the New Living Translation, it says "Talk is cheap, like daydreams and other useless activities. Fear God instead." This clashes i n my mind because I've learned that dreams play an important part in Ancient Near Eastern culture. On a more personal note, I'm a dreamer at heart so to hear that what I do is useless activity hits me at my core. However, according to many commentaries, what it means is those who have many troubles may fantasize of performing great and noble acts, but their aspirations are meaningless. Similarly, many words mark a person as a fool.

Bottom line: When it comes to what you promise God, don't make a promise that you are not sure that you can keep. If you make a vow, be quick to fulfill it. Don't use many words, but rather keep it short and sweet so that your words will have value. This goes for not only with God, but with other people as well. If you want your words to mean something, think them through long and hard before saying them.

2011-04-15T16:55:00.001-07:00

Distractions

Seminary has been probably the toughest challenge to me spiritually that I've ever experienced in my life as a Christ follower. However, through it all, I've told myself "have your rock built on Jesus and your foundation will never be moved." This is a lot easier said than done. I find that there are ideas and beliefs out there that are constantly at war for my mind and my soul. I have to be willing to say no to things that are good and to be willing to be taken over by things that are the best for me.

Jesus said it best:

"Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”

If I build my argument on my own logic, I'm a damn fool and an insensitive one at that. If I built it on pure passion, I'm too sensitive and am prone to change based on feelings. No, my friends, neither one of these work at all. My only hope...our only hope is to build it on Jesus. After all, his community is built on Jesus...my foundation depends on listening to him and following what he says. It is not built on theological or philosophical issues...It is not built on politics or global issues...It is not built on music, art, or literature...It is not built on mathematical or scientific laws or theories...it is built on this:

On Christ the solid rock, I stand
All Other ground is sinking sand....

2010-05-01T10:48:00.000-07:00

Being hurt about situations or by people in life is something that is a part of life even though it should never be enjoyed by anyone in any situation. When those times of hurt come, we should embrace them and work through all those emotions that we are feeling. I don't think there's anyone that would deny that every person should do that.

Where people differ is how they react to these situations and how long they work through those emotions. There really isn't a specific way that everyone reacts to these situation or a specific time table as to how long it takes someone to work through it. Some people keep it inside and internalize it in order to work through it. Some people verbalize it to their friends in order to be able to move forward. Whatever way you move forward, every way is different. The length of time it takes may take some people a matter of a week or two. Some people it may take them much longer to work through things. Whatever the length, every person is different.

We can't control the way people react or how long it takes a person to move through the emotions. What we can do during these times is grant them the grace to deal with things the way they need to and to be patient in the length that it takes the person to work through those emotions. To expect a person to react the same way you do or take the same length of time as you is a distasteful assumption as well as a condition that you have no right to place on a person....

2010-04-30T09:02:00.000-07:00

Do not judge?

We have always been told to never judge people. However, we never take the time to understand what the word judging actually means. According to our good friend Webster, judging means to formulate an opinion about. If that is what judging means, people judge all the time. It's almost unavoidable to judge someone.

In the book I follow and read, it says "Do not judge, or you will be judged." The important concept in this passage is to realize it is not just saying to not judge. Rather, it is saying that unless you want to be judged the same way you judge others, do not judge. An important question to also ask is this: Who is doing the judging here after you judge someone? In the end, we all will be judged by YHWH for the things we have done. That in mind, I think the individual doing the judging is the one that we have judged. So basically, if you don't want to be judged the same way, don't judge anyone else by that standard.

Now their are a few stipulations I would like to add. The next part of the passage it talks about do not talk about the speck in your friend's eye when you have a plank in yours. It says to first remove the plank in your eye before you remove the speck in your friend's. What this is saying to me is that before you go and make a judgement about someone else's faults, you need to make sure that you're doing it for the right reasons, which are out of genuine humility, love and concern for the person. You also need to make sure that you have things set right in your own life or they will come up in the conversation. It may even be that if you struggle with the same thing, the last thing you should do is judge someone for the very same transgression that you commit. Instead, maybe confront the person about the transgression and tell them you struggle with the same thing so that you both can hold each other accountable.

Also, judging is something that should happen within the body of believers. This is called church discipline and is something that is rarely used today. You are to point out a brother's/sister's faults if they are slipping so as to correct them and put them back on the path to where they are more genuinely following Him. This does not mean that you should judge those that do not follow. After all, how can you hold them accountable to standards of the scriptures when they themselves don't even know or much less follow Yeshua?

Lastly, judging in this context, I believe, should only take place if you have a good, trusting, and loving relationship with that person. If I was approached by a person in my church about correcting something about myself and I did not have any kind of personal and deep friendship with that person, I would feel a little insulted. However, if I really knew the person and that they cared about me and that I trusted them, it would motivate me to try to change that part of my life.

What people are really saying when they say do not judge is that you should not condemn. This means that you do not know a person's heart so you have no right to determine that person's salvation or not. In that, people are right, because only condemnation can come from YHWH and we are not YHWH. So when someone tells me to not judge, I'm typically going to ask them what they mean by judge.

Judging is not forbidden, but condemning is...

Lyrics of the Week

Like sex when you're too young
Like youth when you've got none
Like home when you're too drunk
Like getting every you wanted with a line of bad credit
It's never quite worth what you give up to get it

Like style made by slaves
Like bribes to throw the race
Like women who know their place
Like an indian casino or a tank of unleaded
It's never quite worth what you give up to get it

Stand back
You love it now but it's too much

Like fame for what you're not
Like joy that you bought
Like pleasure that never hits the spot
Like security for liberty, you gotta admit it
It's never quite worth what you give up to get it

2010-04-29T08:20:00.001-07:00

How do you build a friendship after the trust is gone? How do you build back up trust? I find in life that anything else can be gained back pretty easy, but in the mountains of friendship, building up trust after you've lost it is life's Mt. Everest. It is the toughest thing to overcome after one has done something to lose it.

2010-04-28T11:00:00.000-07:00

Is there a difference between making a judgement and making an observation? Sometimes I wonder and chew on this question. I don't consider myself a judgemental person at all. However, if a person calls themselves a follower, I do expect for them to live the life that He calls for us to live and I hold them to that standard. The problem is that I forget that often times, I do that without people granting me that permission and that's where I screw up.

2010-04-27T08:57:00.000-07:00

Someone said once that we need to love others. The problem with that is that it just leaves me with more questions. What does it mean to love others? How do we love others? It all seems so terribly complicated and subjective. Where does truth come into the equation? When is it a good time to speak truth to someone? I guess this is where wisdom comes in... a wisdom which I'm nowhere near arriving to yet in my life.

The one I follow knew the perfect time to speak love and be love, but he also knew the perfect time to speak the truth as well. He wasn't always supportive of decisions he knew those who were watching his every move. The older that I get, the more I admire him and how he did things the way he did. I just do not comprehend how he does it.

2010-04-26T16:35:00.000-07:00

It's sad when situations in life don't turn out the way that you'd hoped for them to. Sometimes I just wish I could get people to see things the way I do. It would be so much easier for all of us if they could. Sadly and yet beautifully though, every person thinks differently than the next person. I guess that's what makes it amazing when people come together and can agree on things or disagree on things and still be united. It's a beautiful thing actually...

2010-04-24T18:12:00.001-07:00

People feel guilty after they hurt someone and their feelings. I sometimes want to tell them they shouldn't feel bad for doing it if it was the right thing. However, I do think people should feel bad when they hurt someone. Whether it's the betrayal of a friend by another or the ending of a love relationship, people should remember that feeling in the moment.

It should never feel good hurting another human being. So to that I say...You should feel bad for hurting someone, but if it was the right thing in the end, it's the right thing to do.

2010-04-22T11:34:00.000-07:00

They say I dodged a bullet

I say we probably both did

She would have gotten someone who would have told her what she didn't want to hear

I would have gotten someone that would have never lovingly confronted anyone

She would have gotten someone that would have loved her unconditionally

I would have gotten someone who brought a love with expectations of what's fair

2010-04-21T12:43:00.001-07:00

I love the area in which I live. It has some of the most beautiful natural beauty I've ever been able to experience on a daily basis. This is due to the fact that the people which live around the area that I live claim to be very "green" oriented. I guess I do have to be thankful that they care for God's creation. Sometimes I do wonder though how much they really care about the environment. This is the 18th richest county in the United States that boasts on being green and liberal. The reason I wonder this is that they boast of being green, but I do not see them giving up their houses to live in places that are more sustainable or giving up their gas-guzzling vehicles to cut back on air polution and volunteering to ride public transportation or even bring the BART to this side of the bay.

The truth is they care about the environment to the point where it minimally affects their own lives. When it really starts affecting them in the way that it takes away from the possessions they "need," then they are not so "green" anymore.

2010-04-20T17:52:00.000-07:00

Is loving someone after a dating relationship even possible?

How do you love someone as God requires after a dating relationship is over?

What does love look like within this context?

2009-04-07T16:51:00.001-07:00

I've been thinking about how powerful and necessary confessing. They bring repentance, freedom, relief, peace, joy, tears, and happiness to the confessor as well as to the ones hearing the confession. Saints from long ago even wrote confessions (i.e. St. Augustine and St. John the Cross) that bring us great comfort still yet today. This in mind, I have decided that I'm going to start posting confessions to you guys on here. My reasoning for doing this is that God will be glorified and that I honestly pray in some small way, it will lead those that I love to do the same. I pray this leads to great conversation as well among all of us and I pray that it leads us all to realize that we are all equal. "Confess your sins to one another..." (James 5:16). So here goes my first confession:

I confess to you all that no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to stop judging people. Whether it's verbally, mentally, emotionally, or with a simple reactive facial expression, judging of people seems to always happen with me. I confess that I do this because I place my personal opinions over those of other people. I also do this because in the back of my mind, my pride still tells me I'm intellectually, physically, and spiritually better than some people. I confess that this is wrong...I'm sorry and I pray that you as well as God will please forgive me.

2009-03-19T19:33:00.000-07:00

I've become a person that loves community. I love to gather with friends and/or family and just be able to be open with each other about what we're working through, what frustrates us, what brings us joy, and what were learning through the journey that we find ourselves on in life. I love it so much that I want other people to get on board and do the same. I do so because I believe that is exactly what Jesus did. He spent a lot of time with people and I believe that because of spending a lot of time with people, it led to deeper conversations than just the usual crap known as small talk.

I love community so much that it frustrates me that some people don't really want that. They don't want to be completely open and honest about who they are. They want people to know the good things about them, but not the bad things about them. They love for people to know their good qualities, but have an overwhelming trepidation to people knowing their dark side. It frustrates me that some people are just okay with the small talk crap.

Furthermore, it frustrates me how people where I currently live take the word "friend" so lightly. You can talk to a person for a good hour or have gotten to know a person really well over a couple of weeks and you're automatically their friend. I'll even admit that I almost started falling back into this way of thinking, but I've decided that I am not going back to that. I'm going to give it some serious thought before I call anybody my friend.

Just because we've hung out a handful of times or had a few good talks does not make me your friend. Just because we've shared a few laughs or had a few good times does not make us friends. I may respect you and love talking to you, but in order to be my friend, this requires being open on a deep level and for both of us to have the freedom of sharing what's on our minds and hearts without fear of not being accepted.

This requires for us to be able to have a calmness in the quiet. This requires both of us having a trust in one another. This requires for both of us to know that no matter where we are on this journey called life, we will always be accepting of one another. This also means that we will have laughs, arguments, hard times and good times but that we stay friends through it all. Do we have that? If we don't, maybe it's time for re-evaluation.

2009-02-18T14:05:00.001-08:00

Call this a bit of a confession if you will. I see myself as a really nice guy that really cares about people. I'll give up my time alone if I know that a friend of mine is in need or wants to hang out. I'll even go out of my way for people if I know they need it. I readily trust people and believe that they have the best intentions in mind even when I may not see it.

Here's the confession part. I wish sometimes that I wasn't as nice of a guy as I see myself. I get taken advantage of, disrespected and forgotten about sometimes. I also feel as if sometimes, I miss out on a lot of good opportunities because of it. People always say "nice guys finish last" and I've been finishing last for way too long now so it gets really old, really quick.

I'm not saying this stuff to look for sympathy or pity. I'm saying this to be open and honest and real about how I feel. Nevertheless, I can't bring myself to be a jackass to anybody even no matter how much I want to.

2008-12-17T14:29:00.000-08:00

It's been different living back in the United States. I won't go into great detail about how this change has been for me, but let's just say things have been a little more isolated here than it was in Spain. It's easier to be in your home by yourself or to be anywhere by yourself for the whole time. And if you want to go somewhere, it always costs you something. If you want to go to the coffee shop, it costs gas, time and money.

People also seem to be so disconnected from each other here a lot of times. It seems like people here have a genuine fear of getting close to anyone else, which is something I find really strange. I find it strange because the only logical reason I can think of that people would be fearful of that is because when you let someone close to you, you're giving that person the power to do what they will. They can be a help, encouragement, and blessing. At the same time, they can be hurtful, take advantage of you, and spiteful. I can understand the fear, but at the same time I feel that as a believer, God commands me to not be fearful of anything

2008-11-21T18:11:00.000-08:00

The Social Gospel or "The" Gospel

I was shortly engaged in a conversation with a seminary student a while back about the past elections and my choice for president (if you want to know, just ask me). After a long, in-depth conversation, this person proceeded to insinuate that I was promoting a social gospel and not THE gospel. By that, I mean he seemed to insinuate that I was promoting more of a need to meet people's physical, mental and emotional needs and not their spiritual needs. When he confronted me with that part of it, I was honestly confused by what he was saying because this person seemed to insinuate that in a ways, God only cares about our spiritual well-being and not about the whole person. I am sure he didn't mean to come across this way, but he nevertheless did.

Anyways, it got me thinking about the gospel in and of itself. Is the gospel really just about caring about souls being saved? While I can't answer this question, I do believe that he does want us to live our lives the way Christ intended for us to live it and to actively share our faith in the process. This, to me, means that while sharing our faith, we should fight poverty, abortion, the death penalty, white collar crime, genocide, and other injustices against humanity or things that God frowns upon. It seems that in the United States, we have people either sharing their faith and not being active in standing up for truth and justice or people standing up for truth and justice and not sharing their faith.

The great thing that I see is that is quickly changing. We're quickly finding a generation of believers that have character and actively share their faith while standing up for what's right and against injustice. THAT, to me, IS the gospel. Call it a social gospel if you want, but that to me is The gospel of Christ. After all, didn't God turn water into wine to keep the party going? Didn't he feed the five thousand and preach? Didn't he break bread and pass the cup in the last supper? Didn't he heal those that needed healing while teaching them? Didn't Christ, in a sense, teach, preach, and live what the gospel is? And isn't the gospel not only the way Christ lived, but also Christ in and of itself?

Your thoughts are appreciated....

2008-11-03T10:46:00.000-08:00

Forgive me for this, but since I've been back from Spain, I find that I am not the most patriotic person anymore. Please don't misunderstand that as I don't like or that I hate America. I actually think America has a lot of good things about it, but there are many things about American culture I find really odd and even really wrong.

I began to realize this while I was sitting in church this past sunday and I watched a video talking about things that we as believers should stand up for when voting tomorrow. Instead of raising the cross in the video, they raised the American flag. Instead of raising God's word, they raised the red, white and blue.

Does anybody else find something wrong with this? Doesn't it bother anyone else that we almost place Country over Christ? A president over an everlasting king? Democracy over the kingdom? God bless America over "In God We Trust?"

2008-10-01T10:46:00.000-07:00

Contextualization

It seems that believers love to read their bibles and that's a good thing. However, there has been the issue of how to contextualize the gospel, meaning that how should we read the bible or apply it in our daily lives. Some people tend to think that the way to do that is to go back to what those words really mean in the Greek and Hebrew. Others believe that you should view in the way it was applied to that culture at the time that book of the Bible was written. Yet others believe you should just read the words that are on the bible in front of you and apply it that way as well.

While I can't say how I necessarily feel about contextualizing scripture and how to read it, I do not necessarily think that there is only one correct way to read the scriptures. Please don't think I'm trying to say that every person can necessarily make up their own interpretation of scripture. I believe that we are fallible human beings and are capable of some grave misconceptions as to what God's word is "really saying." I also believe that we should all read the scriptures and study it from different angles and with prayer, meditation, meeting in community with other believers, practicing what we learn and walking in the Spirit, God will reveal the true answers in time. I believe that to say that there's only one way of looking at scripture is putting God in a box and limiting the capability He has of transforming lives through scripture in different ways.

What do you think of contextualizing scripture? What do you believe about this topic?

2008-08-20T10:33:00.001-07:00

Death and Life at a Funeral

Yesterday, I attended the funeral of my Uncle Hugh, who died after a long battle with Pancreatic Cancer. We gathered at the funeral home at 11am and sat with the rest of the family. We heard a sermon from his pastor about his life and what he stood for and even had a visit from the first basketball team he coached in Hoboken, Georgia. The overflowing fragrance of flowers and the overwhelming sensation of happiness, but also of tearful nostalgia of times we had with Hugh filled the room. It was truly a hard, but beautiful moment.

There's a lot to learn about funerals. At first, it's a happy occasion (especially in the case of believers) because you celebrate the fact that even though his/her life on earth is over, they're with the father in Heaven. From there, it turns to sadness and you tend to focus on the fact that the loved one you lost is gone from this earth and how much you will miss him/her. Then at the end, it turns to a happy occasion because you look around you and you begin to treasure the ones around you.

Funerals do teach us so much. Not only a lot about death, but also a lot about life. It teaches us to embrace the fact that one day, we will be like the person we are here to remember in that we will die, our bodies will be put in the ground and the worms will have their way with them. Ben Franklin even said "There are two things certain in life: Death and Taxes." There's not many things in life that are certain, but it is certain for all of us that we're all going to die. We need to quit trying so hard to avoid it and just accept that when the time comes for us to die, that we will die with honor and dignity and be able to not regret a single moment of our lives.

Funerals teach us a lot about life. It makes us ask the question if we have truly lived life or if we have only done enough to survive through life. I have to be honest and say that I see too many people just surviving and not enough people truly living. It seems that we as believers are thinking so much about the life to come, that we forget about the life that we have right now. I'm not trying to say that I don't do this from time to time because I do. I'm just saying that when is the last time we as human beings truly lived and not just talked about living or surviving. Make the most of the day, love God, and love others. God is not just the God of the past and future, but more importantly he's the God of the present. Enjoy every moment.

2008-08-01T16:47:00.001-07:00

Loneliness

Everywhere I look, I seem to see lonely people. From China to Spain, Atlanta to Tifton, from Restaurants to even churches, it seems that there's an inherent loneliness in all of us. There's even times where one can be in a room full of people and still feel lonely or all alone. I've even heard stories where couples feel lonely as well.

I've been really pondering why this is the case in the life of all humanity and really think that the answer is straight forward and honest. This loneliness came into the world thousands of years ago when one man and one woman decided to eat from the only tree in a certain garden that they were not to eat from. This loneliness started when two people decided to do things their own way instead of the way that God intended for us. In a sense, the loneliness we feel at times is because of the human condition that each of us have. It serves as a reminder that there's only one person that can feel that void in our lives. God is the only person that can feel that void in our lives and a relationship with Him is the only thing that can make us whole... truly whole. He's the only thing that makes our lives rich, deep, hopeful and peaceful in the midst of a broken world full of wars, genocide, hunger, conflict and desolation.

I'm learning that the loneliness feeling will never go away. It will show up from time to time in my life and I'm certain that it will show up in married life as well as in a life of singleness. The difference is that I know now that God is the only person that fills that void in my life. Why do you think there's a loneliness in the world?

2008-07-25T14:12:00.000-07:00

It's been a long two years...I mean a year and a half

Well it's been a dang long time since I've written on my blog so I'll fill you in on what's going on as much as possible. I moved back to the United States on July 8, where I was greeted at the airport by my girlfriend, Heather. She drove me back to Tifton, along with my two footlockers, one suitcase and my backpackers backpack. The first place I ate at when getting back home was Carraba's (I love their rosemary chicken).

Anyways, the transitioning has been good so far. It's been excellent to see friends and family and to have the opportunity to catch up with them. I've also applied for a job at starbucks and hopefully, I will hear from them soon. After knowing of the job I will have, I will decide how I am going to get involved in the community here. The choices are looking like Big Brothers Big Sisters or Boys & Girls Club.

As far as adjusting to living back in the "American Dream," it's been slow but good. I really miss food in affordable olive oil, café con leche and chocolate croissants, but it's been nice to exchange that for sweet tea, thick juicy steaks and good whole grain bread that doesn't turn into a weapon after a day. However, conversations with people have been what I would deem to be shallow or superficial. It's quite an adjustment going from talking about what's going on in the world to talking about sports 24-7. Don't get me wrong because I love sports, but I just believe certain things are worth talking about more than Brett Favre's "retirement." However, it will take time to become accustomed to this new way of living.

2008-05-28T09:24:00.000-07:00

When Friends Become Family

I watched my supervisor, his wife and kids pack up everything they could possibly pack in 6 suitcases, load it on a plane and head home, not knowing when or if I would ever see them again. I cried, kissed their kids, hugged all of them and told them "see you later" (you guys know I'm not good at goodbyes). I felt as if I was saying goodbye to not just my supervisor and his wife and kids, but I felt like I was saying goodbye to a part of my family.

It's strange, yet bitter-sweet how attached we become to people that come into our lives. We go from not knowing people at all and being weird around them to being so comfortable and accepted around the ones we love. We go from uncertainty with people, to comfort, acceptance, encouragement and love with those around us. I definitely believe my boss' family is part of my family.

This led me to thinking about this one question that's been on my mind. When did these people as well as other friends in my life become family to me? What are the qualifications for this six letter word that we have in our lives. While I can't speak for other people, I will say that those that are family to me are distinct from just friends. Family are people that welcome you into their home with no questions asked and say with words and deeds "Come on in...you don't have to prove yourself...you are accepted here...rest and relax and be who you are...tell us how you feel or what you are thinking...because we love you no matter what."

From there, I got to thinking and even fear this thought. Oh how I wish the church...the body...Christ's body, was like this to each other and to the world. I look back on so much of my life and have felt as if I have had to jump through hoops, do a little dance or be on try-out to be able to be accepted into a group and it's not just in the world either. I believe that if we were really like this to the world, they couldn't help but want the gift that we have inside of us. The world is tired of the condemnation and the judgement and the pointing of fingers. What the world needs is faith, hope and love. Paul said in his letter to the church at Corinth "Now these three things remain; faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these things is love." They are looking for community, for people to love them, for a family. We need to be Jesus to them and not their judge or jury.

My boss has been just that to me. He has shown me how to love people even when they can be a pain in the neck sometimes. He's taught me that people should never have to try out to be accepted. He's affirmed in me to love people for who they are, but hope for who they could be and have faith that God will work in them. He's taught what a home of love can look like. I have learned faith through the smiles of their kids and compassion through their tears. Thank you Caleb, Lindsey, Jonas and Meredith. I'm a better person for knowing you. Every tear I shed is one of happiness because I was blessed to know you for this past year and am blessed to get to know you more in the years to come. You guys are not friends anymore, but you are and will always be my family. Te agradezco!

2008-04-08T09:05:00.000-07:00

A Friend's Birthday Party

My friend, Francis, had a birthday party two weeks ago and I was invited to attend the birthday party. We celebrated with Pizza, drinks and Karaoke and just a time of good conversation and fellowship with good friends. Here's a picture from the party. God bless and praise be to Him for all my friends here!

2008-04-01T09:21:00.000-07:00

Patience is a virtue

As streams of sweat and heavy breathing came about as I was jogging through the park today, God directed my thinking towards patience and how He has developed it in my life and is developing it in my life. I thought through all the years of plowing through the field of patience and how hard and frustrating, yet liberating and peaceful it has been over the years and even in my time here.

I began to come to a conclusion that in my own life, God uses urban areas to develop patience in different ways than he uses rural areas. I find that when walking through beautiful, God-created landscape, that God develops patience with myself as well as with his overall plan for my life. He's taught me through nature that his plan is perfect and that I just have to build patience in knowing that "he will carry it on to completion" (Phil 1:6). I learn that my timing is so short-sided to compared to the timing that God has for all things, including myself as His child.

Through working in a booming metropolis like Barcelona, you come in contact with so many people. There are crowds that are sometimes hard to push through, people taking their time getting things in a grocery store, people rushing to get on the Metro, people even being inconsiderate for others, or even friends not opening up as quickly as I'd like for them to. I find that in a big city, God has and is teaching me to have patience with people and even with people that I don't really know. Those that know me know that I can be a person that's always on the go and going quickly. To slow down is aggravating to me and I get really impatient. Thanks be to God that he is patient with me and if He can be patient with me, He can certainly teach me to be patient with others.

I remember a song as a kid that said "I can wait to have patience...because patience is a wonderful thing." Patience is a virtue, but it requires patience to develop patience. I will patiently wait for God to develop this further in my life.

Feel free to comment on this. Do you agree or disagree? What are you experiencing with Patience?

2008-03-25T05:53:00.000-07:00

Another Camino, Another Spiritual Journey

These past two weeks, I have been on a two week, 140-mile hiking journey through Northern Spain on the Way of St. James. I had done the same journey last time for a week and only 75 miles. To refresh everyone's memory, this journey was a journey taken in Ancient times to the place were James is buried, which is Santiago de Compostela. It technically starts in Saint Jean Pie de Port, France and goes all the way to the Northwest corner of Spain, a journey that typically takes a little over a month to do. However, I only did two weeks of it because I simply just don't have a month to spend to be able to do that.

This time around on the journey, I learned so many different things. As I began to experience life on this inward and outward journey, I began to experience something this time around that I had failed to experience all my life. I began to notice the explosion of colors all around the Galician countryside. The combinations of brown, green, yellow and purple that make Galicia beautiful. I began to notice the early morning fog, the light rain, the moments of sunshine pushing its way through the clouds. I began to experience God in a new way and it was throught the world he created. As I walked this long journey, my mind was at peace with the world around me and God brought this small understanding of Him through his creation.

I also was able to experience the journey with fellow sojourners along the way. People from Spain, France, Germany and even the United States. We all had a common bond in aching muscles, strained ligaments and feet filled with blisters. We all were on some sort of journey, both inward and outward. We were all opened to sharing our spiritual experiences with one another. God was truly at work in the lives of those around me to speak to me and I can only hope God used me to do the same to those around me.

Lastly, I came to grips in a small way with my own humanity on this journey. I began to realize that even though God has done so much in me these past 11 months, but my life journey with the Lord is still not over. I still have limitations, vices and gifts in my personality that can be obstacles at times. However, I shouldn't focus on these things, but rather focus on loving God and what it means when God says he loves us. I believe that comprehending how much God loves me will lead me to a greater love for him and a greater desire to do the things He has me to do.

2008-03-06T12:35:00.000-08:00

The longer I'm here, the more I realized how I am just okay and how good and big God is. That's something that we tend to say all the time. "God is good all the time and all the time God is good" or we sang the song as kids "My God is so BIG, so strong and so mighty there's nothing my God cannot do." I have wondered in my own life this very question that I am about to present to you all. If God really is so BIG and so GOOD, then why do we let the fears we have in our lives control us? I would like to think that if I thought God was so big that the world we live in couldn't contain him, why don't I live a life of faith sometimes that shows He's that big or that He is that good? Why don't we, the church do that?

I'll admit for me that I've so often confused comfort as peace when that's not necessarily the case.i I believe that in America, I grew up with the illusion that comfortable was what really mattered. I had to have comfortable clothes, comfortable shoes, a comfortable bed, and a house with Air Conditioning. Now I may not have it as bad as people in other places, but I don't have air-conditioning, I wear the tightest jeans I've ever worn in my life, I have a fauxhawk haircut, and I live in a strange land that speaks a strange language and has a strange culture (thanks Thom Wolf). As close as Europe is to America in some ways, I'm still not 100% comfortable with things here. However, a good friend taught me that being uncomfortable isn't always a bad thing. Maybe we all in the American church should remember that...Maybe we've become so comfortable and fearful that we forgot to love God and that "perfect love drives out all fear."

2008-02-24T05:02:00.000-08:00

Growing weary

I have been doing concerts about every week at the Palace Bar and it seems as if I am coming up dry from doing them. I guess I have grown tired of doing the mundane things here...the things that I do every week because I feel obligated to do them. For those that know me know that I hate doing things out of obligation. Maybe God is telling me it's time to look for another place to play. I still want to maintain a good relationship with the people at the Palace Bar, but I believe it's time to branch out a little and try for some new places.

2008-02-22T05:34:00.000-08:00

A Cool European Haircut

For those of you that have been to Europe and have ever gone to the hair salon to get a haircut, you guys know that you can request whatever you want at the place. Regardless of what you request most of the time, the hair stylist does whatever he wants to your hair. However, this time, I went to a different place than I usually go to because I wanted to try to get the famous European Fauxhawk.

Many of you may be asking this question "What is a fauxhawk?" Well I am glad you asked that question because I will gladly answer with words and pictures. A fauxhawk is like a mohawk, except on the sides, it is not bald, but rather just a lot shorter compared to the hair movement down the middle.

I have to say that I rather enjoy this style of haircut and will probably get it from now on or as long as it is popular here in Europe. Here's the pictures for proof if you need something like that. Until next time...

2008-02-19T04:43:00.001-08:00

I have realized that my last couple of blogs have been on the attack about things in the church or things in American Society. This blog however is going to be one of confession. A confession to things that I have done when I was in the States:

- I confess that I have lived a life of double dutch missions as I call it. I stand on the outside, wait for the opportunity, get in, do my job and get out and think "that was fun." However, the problem is that I have treated it like a job and haven't really invested in any individuals that I've come in contact with on these trips. I have been full of broken promises to people that I promised to e-mail and still be a part of their life journey. Because of that, I don't know where they are in their walk with Christ.

- I realized that I have not consistently taken the light into the dark areas of the community around me. I have been content in my Christian bubble with a fear of lostness contamination. I've let fear of being influenced by the world overcome my fear of the Lord in my life.

- I confess that I have read and memorized scripture my whole life, but not applied every word of it that I have ever memorized.

- I confess that I have not lived a life where I am that encourages community with those around me and have depended so much on my independence, that I forget the gospel is about being around people and sharing Him with those that don't know Him.

- I confess that I have picked and chosen in the past who I want to share the gospel with instead of just being open as to who God brings my way.

- I confess that in my past, I made stances against certain movies or books instead of taking stances against things that really matter.

- I confess that I have spent money on selfish desires that will come and go instead of really investing it in things that will make the world a better place for everyone.

More to come...

2008-02-18T07:47:00.000-08:00

The longer I am away from the United States, the longer I realize there's some things I don't understand the things that our nation and God's bride, the church does and supports.

For the life of me, I don't understand how we went into a nation to rid this nation of a dictator that was killing his own people. Yet why don't we don't go into countries like Sudan, Chad and Kenya to help bring peace to those countries and let diplomacy rule in those countries? I know that probably the ultimate answer to that statement is that there's no benefit for us, but why should we base what country we help on what we get out of it? Why do we as the United States do anything solely based on what we can gain from it?

One of the things that troubles me about the church I've experienced back home is that we seem to be partial about sharing the gospel with certain people. We pick and choose who should come to know Christ, when Christ came so that all might live. I remember we would go to a certain neighborhood in my town and share the gospel in the low cost residential areas in our neighborhood once a week. While that is good to do, why isn't there someone doing that throughout the year? What are we afraid of?

Another thing with the church is the thing we stand against. We try to boycott movies and controversial books. Maybe we need to read these books and watch these movies and put them in relation to God's word and what the bible says. Don't you think avoiding things like this further puts us out of touch with the world around us and keeps us from being missional like we are suppose to be? I'm so tired of boycotting stupid things like movies and books. I would rather boycott industries that support sweat shops in third world countries or buy fair trade coffee than do something that does nothing but separate me from the world and puts me out of touch with those around me.

2008-02-09T03:31:00.000-08:00

The life I live here is pretty simple to understand, but not so easy to live and not so safe. God brought me here to live my life as a believer in front of my friends. I also do language exchanges with them as well as assist bringing interns over for them to study Spanish as well as Catalan and Spanish culture. I also do a little bit of music in my spare time. It sounds like the perfect kind of job, right? One that's easy and comfortable since I live in Western Europe.

However, I want to make clear a couple of things that have been on my mind as of lately. People tend to glamorize or make me out to be a hero in the life I live and what I do here or even the fact that I live in Western Europe. Now for one thing, I've never viewed what I do as to be held up to a position of heroism. I'm just a man that was willing to go where God called me to be. I have to be honest and say that this view of what I do really frustrates me because it seems that by saying that, people place a blanket between themselves and a call to this kind of work so they don't have to answer it. I'm not saying that everyone's called to do this kind of work. Rather, I am asking that nobody raise me to a hero status. I am just an ordinary man that was obedient, that's all.

Another thing that some people may think is that it's easy to do what I do here. While I do have access to many things here like I would in the United States, I would say that this place is one of the most spiritually dry and dark places I've ever been to on this planet. There seems to be a real hardness to the gospel here. There's also a great deal of spiritual danger where I am because the society I live in is so open to so many things. It's easy to live in the States, where you have your church bubble and go on trips into the "danger zone" to share the joy that you have. I'll admit that I'm guilty of doing this in my past and now I look back on it and wished I'd really invested myself in the cultures around me. I would go on trips for a week, a month or even three months and then come back and share the pictures. I'll admit that I don't even keep in contact with hardly any of them. I regret the fact that I haven't kept up with them and been there along their journey.

That being said, I absolutely love being here and to be able to do what I do is a blessing. I will confess to you that the thought of going back into the Christian subculture in a way intimidates me to no end. Don't get me wrong in that I want to be surrounded by believers, but at the same time I don't want to lose sight of the calling that God has placed on every believer's life... to go and make disciples of all nations, to love your neighbor as yourself and to love God with all my heart, mind, soul and strength.

Despite these deep moments of thought, things here have been going well. I have been traveling a good bit as I have been to England and Germany in the past month. We had a strategy forum here in Barcelona last week, where people that work for the company all over Europe got together to discuss new strategies and such. It was a blessing to meet many of my co-workers and to be able to connect with teachers in the States. However, I was glad it was over because I feel like I've been going non-stop for this whole past month. I'm just ready to be back to hanging out with my friends here and not busy doing busy work and such.

2008-01-13T09:06:00.001-08:00

So I had my first gig last night at the Palace Bar and I believe it went well for a first performance. I vividly remember the emotions and thoughts running through me the week leading up to the concert. I was at peace the whole week about it and the nervousness really didn't hit me till the day of the show. That whole day, I spent in prayer and reflection and just asking God to grant me the strength to do the best that I possibly could.

So I set up all my stuff and have my set list ready for the show. At the start, there wasn't many people at the bar. However, the more I get ready, the more people start piling into the bar. I was thinking "Jeez, God...I was fine with a few people and now I have to play in front of 100 people easy." Nevertheless, I led in with the first song, which was a little rusty, but fine. Next thing I know, I'm on my last song and people are applauding me. Even Thomas (the manager) said I did a great job and invited me back to play.

To conclude, the concert was a success. Thanks to all those who had me in your thoughts and prayers during that time. I will have pictures soon to post so I will post them as soon as I get them. Thanks for everything

2007-11-18T08:19:00.001-08:00

Que tal tio?

The longer that I am here, the more I am starting to observe the differences between the American and the Spaniard way of thinking. I left here thinking that I have never had much in common with the "American way." However, I am discovering I have more in common with my homeland than I thought I did. I am also discovering that I am becoming more and more Spaniard the longer that I am here and I have to tell you, I'm delighted in the person that God is molding me and making me into here. In the meantime, it's amazing how much of what we think is "biblical" when it is actually just tradition.

One small difference I have noticed in thinking is in the way we start talking with people when we first meet an individual. We start off with the typical "Hello! What is your name?" What I've discovered is the next question asked is different between Americans and Spaniards. Americans ask "What do you do?" or if you're in college "What is your major?" If you already know the person, the question usually is "What have you done today?" In Spaniard culture, it is much different. The first question is "How are you?" Now for me, I find this so incredibly comforting about culture here. A friend from here said "You Americans are so concerned with what kind of job a person has instead of the person... All we tend to care about is that they just have a job or are going to school because that's all that's needed to show they're not lazy."

Now this shows me something incredibly significant about culture here. It shows me that Spaniards care more about who you ARE and not what you DO. I find that as an incredible fault in American culture that we only care about what people do and not about how they are. I find it an incredible fault that we give a default answer of "fine" or "good," when all inside of us is falling apart sometimes and others don't know it.

I am not saying that I have the right answer nor to I pretend to be the person that knows everything. My opinion culture maybe wrong. There maybe some of you out there are saying that you are not like that and for those of you out there that are not like, this does not apply to you. However, we all have to ask ourselves if we really care about how we all are doing or do we care about what people do. To me, it's no wonder why people are legalistic when we ask them what they are doing and place more emphasis on that then the heart condition of a human being.

The life of Jesus shows us that he was more concerned with us being and not what we do. He was more concerned about the heart condition and less concerned about the actions of a person. Jesus knew that in the end, what we do would flow out of what we are. Have you ever given much thought to the fact that the fruits of the Spirit are a state of being and not a state of doing? So in turn, I ask, How are you doing? How are you really doing?

2007-11-10T04:47:00.000-08:00

Barcelona - The City that Celebrates Chocolate?

Today, I had the opportunity to go to something I've never experienced in the United States- I went to the Chocolate Festival of Barcelona. For 8 euros ($11.75), I got to see all sorts of different chocolate on display. From dark chocolate to milk chocolate, from chocolate with cinnamon to chocolate with cayenne pepper, it had so many different varieties. I got to try a little bit of everything while I was there so needless to say it was a fun time. Here are some photos:

The Entrance To The Festival

Delicious samples

A Chocolate Lover's heaven

Chocolate, Whipped Cream, and Strawberries

2007-11-04T16:18:00.000-08:00

Why are we so afraid to be vulnerable in front of people? Why do we feel as if we always have to have the answers to everything in life? Why do we not ever want to admit that we need help to others? Why are we afraid to surrender?

2007-10-24T02:25:00.001-07:00

I'm From Barcelona

All credit for having this video goes out to Tanner Cogsdil, one of our illustrious intern. Even though it's mostly comical, it definitely portrays the love, fashion sense, and mentality of our city. Peace!

2007-10-11T05:16:00.000-07:00

It's Time It Cooled Off Here

Seriously, it's about time...It's been blistering hot here all throughout July and August so I'm glad it's gotten cool here lately. It's nice to be able to wear a jacket when going out and to be able to see the changing of seasons unfold before you. It's also been really rainy here, which is always a good thing. There's something strange about cool weather that just makes it seem more intimate and heart-felt than any other kind of weather. Rain always seems to bring about a gentleness and a calmness as well...the kind of calmness that makes you want to curl up in bed and just sleep the day away. Don't worry though because I have not been doing that this month whatsoever.

I've been thinking about what I find so great about living here and the answer I come up with is quite complex. This city is slowly fast-paced, has a chaotic order, and a quiet noisyness so to speak. I know those things may not make any sense to anyone reading my blog, but those are the senses that I get about living here.

I miss this beautiful woman so much, it drives me crazy sometimes.

2007-10-02T14:14:00.000-07:00

Residency is Almost there...

So yesterday, I traveled to finish up the last bit of my residency stuff for Spain and it was an adventure in itself. First off, my flight left at 6:35 am in the morning. My initial thinking was "Okay, I need to get up at 3am so I can get up and get ready to be to the airport by no later than 4am." I thought this because the last time I had to catch a flight that early in the morning, it took forever to get through security. I wanted to go to bed at 11pm, but I had to take care of a few things around the apartment first and ended up not getting to bed till 12am, thereby only giving me 3 hrs of sleep.

After arriving in Madrid at 8 am, I immediately met up with the man in charge and we drove to his place to catch the metro from there to the government building on the other side of town. It only took literally 3 hrs of waiting in line to get everything taken care of, which is a big praise for that. The only step left is to wait 40 days to get my card and my residency is complete. Thanks for all those who have been thinking of me through that.

The Little Things

It's amazing how after being into my experience here for 7 months how you so easily forget the little things that made you so excited to begin with. You forget where you are and where you've been in a sense after being here a while. As I was traveling to Madrid yesterday, I quickly remembered how I had forgotten that I live in freaking Spain! I quickly forget that I get to enjoy living in a decent flat, get fed well and have many amenities that many of my other friends or other people in the world do not get to enjoy. It's the little things in life that I am learning to enjoy now and not just the major things.

2007-09-24T05:44:00.000-07:00

La Merce
Every year at the end of September, Barcelona celebrates the Festival of La Merce, a festival in honor of the patron saint of Barcelona, Mare Deu de La Merce. The Festival kicks off on a Friday and ends on a Monday. Catalan arts and crafts are for sale during the day and concerts going on all night. During the day time and night time, other events go on as well.

One such event that goes on is the Castallers, the building of human towers. This takes place in the Plaça De Sant Jaume I and begins with the heavy lifters at the bottom and ends with the light, agile people at the top. After each level is completed, music is played over the sound system. At the end, a little child stands on the top with a helmet on and throws his/her hands up in victory and the crowd cheers loudly. Here are two pictures from Castallers.

"The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and they are saved."

- Proverbs 18:10

Another event that goes on is the Correfoc. There are two Correfocs, one for children and one for adults. During the Correfoc, kids and children dress up as devils with a stick device that twirls at one end. Placing a roman candle-like firecracker on the twirling end and the people hold the stick in the air or shoot the firecracker on the grounds towards people and they dance in front of the sparks or under them. It is quite a spectacle to see. Below is a video of the event.

Come Fall On Us, We Fall On You...

Today is a day of sadness, but nevertheless, a new chapter in my life. As I was watching the Castallers yesterday, I was reminded of Proverbs 18:10 and how strong the name of the Lord is. As I witnessed a dear friend leave to go home, I became blunt with the Lord and prayed "God I know I'm suppose to place my trust and hope in you, but do you expect me to be here all alone with no guy to relate to what I'm going through? What am I going to do here now? This is going to be impossible without you and complete dependence on you." I praise the Lord for showing me this in my life. My heart hurts that my friend has left, but at the same time rejoices that my journey is not over, but rather it's just another chapter in my journey here.

2007-09-20T15:12:00.000-07:00

I think the one thing that I've began to realize since being here is what is truly valuable in this life that I have. First though, I will start by saying what is not valuable to me in my life. What is not valuable to me in life is the things I own. I slowly have begun to realize that the things I say I "need" are only things I want. I want the new iPod touch, but I don't need it...I would like to buy new clothes at ZARA or H&M, but I don't need them.

I am also realizing that traveling to distant, far-away lands is not valuable to me at all. Sure I love to travel to other countries and be a tourist sometime...I mean, who doesn't enjoy that?! However, at the end of my life, will those be the things I will remember the most? The fact that I lived in Spain for two years and got to visit Portugal, Italy, Switzerland, Argentina, Costa Rica, Bolivia, Venezuela, Uruguay, China and England? I have come to the conclusion that this isn't what's valuable in my life either.

So what is it that I see as valuable in this existence that I call "my life?" What are the things that make life mean so much to me? One thing that means more to me than trips or possessions is the people I experience all those things with. I could go to every country on the globe, but if I don't have someone with me to reminisce about those trips and the experiences along the way, what's the use in going? Life's not nearly as fun without friends or family in your life to experience them with.

I have come to also realize that God is truly the most valuable thing I could ever have in my life. He knows me, loves me, is merciful to me and sustains me in times of trouble and turmoil. Even though the mountains may fall into the sea, the Lord is a warrior and stands strong for me in the times that I feel weak. I feel so little and insignificant compared to him and to know that he is above all nations and people, brings comfort to my soul.

To all my friends and family, I say thank you for the experience that I have had with each and everyone of you. Your smiles and laughter, sadness and tears have forever been impressed upon the walls of my mind and heart. You have taught me things that I will forever carry the rest of my life about God, the world, and the beauty of everything around me.

To my God, I say thank you for being there with me in the hard times and the good times. Thank you for your mercy and grace even when I don't even deserve it. Thank you for the times where you make me laugh and the times where I break down and you pick me back up and set my feet upon a rock.

2007-08-23T15:52:00.001-07:00

It truly is better to give than to receive... :)

2007-08-19T06:25:00.001-07:00

The Festa Major De Gracia

Every year between August and September, each neighborhood in the city of Barcelona celebrates it's existence with music, fair-like food and other things. The first of these festivals is the Festa Major De Gracia. In the neighborhood of Gracia, streets compete by decorating their portion of the streets with recyclables or other things. The winner gets the sole recognition of winning the major event. There is also a lot of bands playing, people dancing, people watching movies. That being said, I went with my friend Federico to discover what all the fuss was about. Here are the pictures to prove it

Me standing in the underwater-designed street (yes Mike, I have a murse...lol).

This one is the one that got first place in two categories. It was so impressive, I couldn't get all of it in one shot.

This is me and my friend Federico. We had a good time of conversation and sharing about things with an awkward pause every now and then.

So as you can see the festival was quite fun. More pictures coming soon.

JKW

2007-08-12T05:09:00.000-07:00

So it occurred to me that I have not put up any pictures of my flat on my blog (props to the parental units for reminding me). Without further adieu, here's the pictures...

This is my super cool living room...This is where my musical creations all happen.

This is my stylish kitchen. A lot of culinary experiments have been performed already in this area of the apartment.

This is my area of deep reflection and thought...also known as my bathroom.

This is my bedroom with complementary fan as it gets really hot here considering I have no AC.

Pictures of me in Barcelona coming soon....

2007-08-11T13:02:00.000-07:00

As much as I love change...sometimes it freaks me out.

2007-08-10T03:17:00.000-07:00

My friend Mateo tagged me for one of these chain blog type of things (thanks Matt...sarcastically speaking). Therefore I must do this post.

Rules:

1.  You must post these rules before giving the facts.

2.  Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.

3.  People who are tagged must write their own blog (about their 8 things) and 

      post these rules.  (If you are a non-blogger you can email them.  Just don’t be   

      annoying.)

4.  At the end of the blog I must tag eight people and give their names.

5.  Remember to leave a comment letting them know that they’ve been tagged   

      and to ready your blog.

And now....

8 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME:

1. I have all the clothes in my closet color coordinated.

2. When I walk in between cement blocks, I count the steps I take in each cement block.

3. I have been addicted to Desperate Housewives recently (thanks Eva...lol).

4. I dance sometimes to music playing loud in my flat.

5. I have all my coins neatly organized.

6. My childhood dream growing up was to be either an astronaut, a garbage man, or a construction guy  (what can I say...I loved heavy machinery).

7.   I had a huge fear of cockroaches growing up.  Partly because I had one fly at my face and another crawl up my leg when I was little.

8. When I'm doing a #2 in the bathroom, I always use four sheets of toilet paper for every swipe.

Tag, your it:  Peyton, Daniel, Jimmy, Hope, Stefanie, Heather Sumner, Zach, Matt Baker

2007-08-06T10:43:00.000-07:00

Summer Vacation Has Begun (for Spaniards)

In Spain, the whole month of August is vacation time for Spaniards...I know I wish I had a whole month of vacation a year. Needless to say, most of my Spaniard friends will be gone on vacation during this time, leaving Barcelona absolutely dead around here. My favorite chocolate shop here will be closed for the whole month which really stinks. I really like going there and getting a cafe con leche with a mint dark chocolate bar.

Copeland + Cloudy Weather

I have discovered the perfect music to listen to during an overcast or rainy weather. The perfect music to listen to is the band Copeland. Every time I listen to them when it is overcast, the wonderful melodies of guitar combined with the vocals of Aaron just make this band the ultimate to listen to. So if you ever have an overcast or rainy weather, be sure to listen to Copeland during that time. Copeland is a great band regardless, but they're meant to listen to during those rainy days.

Changes (and I don't mean just clothes either)

There's already so many changes in myself and in those from home I keep in contact with. I can tell the shifts in the way I think and do things has changed considerably and I have to say, I like where God is taking me with this. I'm learning to truly care for those around me, to care for the planet, as well as truly become more real with people than ever.

Haley reminded me of the story of the Dragon in C.S. Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader. In this story, the Dragon was a human before this. The Lion tells the dragon that he must tear the dragon skin off. The dragon tries this and then proceeds to look in the water to see if he's changed back into human form, only to discover he's the same. The Lion ultimately tells the Dragon that only him tearing it away can change it. After tearing away at the dragon's skin, the dragon is in pain for a while. He looks down and notices that he's back to human form. This story reminded me that change can and will be painful at times, but that the only meaningful change can be brought by Christ and Christ alone.

That's it for now you guys. Take care and God bless.

2007-07-29T03:20:00.000-07:00

Happy Fourth of July (on July 21?)

Since the fourth of July is our day of independence, our Spaniard friends have been asking us how we celebrate our Independence Day and asking us what kind of stuff we do. We all figured that since they are asking us, Why don't we just have a fourth of July party. The thing was that we couldn't have the party on the Fourth, so we moved it all the way back to July 21st. The party was planned, invitations were made and we were raring to go.

Although most of the preparations were planned last minute and at times we (the team) felt like chickens with our heads cut off, the party was extremely successful. It started at 9:30pm and went on till 3am! We talked with friends, listened to music, ate hot dogs, hamburgers, tortilla chips with Jalapeño dip and brownies (those went quickly too). The best part was just being in fellowship with friends and laughing and having good conversation and getting to know those around us. We even put in some Shakira music and danced a little bit. Paolo, an Argentine who's a magician, came later and did some magic tricks and became the life of the party.

I think the longer and longer that I am here, the more I'm beginning to realize that life is something to be experienced and not just merely read through the eyes of another person. You can't experience things to the fullest if you haven't experienced them yourself. The same thing goes with scripture and biblical things. Until you have really experienced what that says, you'll never really be able to truly embrace its truth for yourself.

Here is a video by Sarah McLachlan called World is On Fire that really moved me and made me think about how blessed I am and how there's much I can do for the rest of the world. I hope the next time you think you have it bad, you watch this video. Remember, life is not about what you get, but about what you can give...

2007-07-23T14:10:00.000-07:00

I struggle with forward motion...

Why does it always seem like I struggle with motivation to do anything? Ugh...this is so frustrating for me. I feel as if I have the language down, the culture is fine, life with Spaniards is great, but this whole music thing to me just seems so overwhelming. When something's overwhelming to me, I just shut down and say to myself "Why even bother? I'm not going to be able to accomplish that in two years?"

I was also thinking about 1 Corinthians 10:31 where it says "Therefore, whatever you do, whether you eat or drink, do it all for the glory of God." I honestly have to say that I am not living this out with the music stuff here at all. I struggle to do anything with it. I haven't sang in two weeks, I haven't written a song in a week, and I feel like I'm just never going to accomplish anything. However, I'm definitely not going to accomplish anything by sitting on my butt all day and doing nothing.

I guess what I am asking for is prayer about this area of my life. I wish there was some magic cliche or some encouraging speech that would make me want to work my hardest, but nothing comes to mind. Pray that I will be diligent in my music work as well as work in areas that I may not like, but that I have to do. Thanks you guys.

2007-07-15T03:08:00.000-07:00

Our days were numbered by nights on too many rooftops

They said we're wasting our lives

Oh at least we know that if we died, we lived with passion

They say we burn so bright

- A by Cartel

Why do we spend so much time looking into the future or at the past instead of enjoying what's right in front of us? This question came to my mind today as I woke up from my bed in the Born this morning. I know that I spend so much time looking to the future and thinking that it will be better when I get there. In the process, I waste so much time today and not making the most of every moment in the here and now.

In connection with that, I've been wondering what the word passion really means in real life and in my own life. According to the famous Webster's Dictionary, it is an intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction. After reading that definition, I have realized that passion in my own life has been drained and my passion for being here doesn't seem as strong as it was when I first came here. I feel as a leaf in the wind, being blown from thing to thing and just going with the motions.

At the same time, I believe passion is something that can only be lived in the here and now in life. You can't live passionately in the future or the past, but only in the present. We need to realize that today is a gift and need to live it wildly for today and for no other time and place. To think on the future or past to waste passion for today.

A Passionate Life Over a Regretful Life

I've also thought about the fact that I'd rather live and die living passionately than live and die regretfully...regretfully knowing that I didn't do what I've always dreamed of. That way if I die, at least I can say I died living passionately and wholehearted being a servant as Christ was. There have been very few times in my life where I've lived life to the fullest.

I've always played my life safely and not passionately to a sense. I'm not talking about living recklessly, I'm talking about living passionately. I've always felt like I have a side of me that is just bursting to get out that I have kept bottled up for so long. I need to feel what feeling alive feels like. I need to take risks and live life with a bold and wild passion and not just keeping to myself and playing it on the safe side.

Lord, I pray that I never lose passion in my life... To live for the here and now because I'm not guaranteed tomorrow or the next day, but only guaranteed my life for today. I'm tired of living in the past and future, but I want to live for today for you and nobody else. I'm also tired of living safely, but rather if I am to die, I would rather die knowing that I lived and died with passion for you. Father, you are the only thing I need for today and for the rest of my life. I love you and thank you for today and if you choose to, I thank you for tomorrow.

Amen

Shelter me oh genius words

Just give me strength

Just to pin these things

And give me peace to well her wings

And Oh, Oh carry on all you minstrels of the world

- The Minstrel's Prayer by Cartel

2007-07-12T14:09:00.000-07:00

On The Set...or Something like that

So today we were getting work done (or I should say Matt was getting work done and I was sleeping because I wasn't feeling good) and Matt gets a call. Come to find out, Woody Allen is filming a movie in Barcelona and he was filming part of the movie a few feet from our apartment and right under the girl jman's apartment. Naturally, we hurried over to the girls apartment to catch the action.

Sure enough, there was Woody Allen standing there waiting for things to be set up for the scene they were filming next in the movie. We find out through others that Scarlet Johannson and Penelope Cruz are in this movie as well. Well we are waiting around to see the other stars and sure enough, Scarlett Johannson comes on the set. She's pretty short and look like a normal person for the most part. I got a few pictures of Scarlett and Woody (we're on first name basis...lol).

(I know you can't tell, but trust me when I say that this is Woody Allen)

(Yep...that's Scarlett Johannson a few feet away from the girl's and my apartment)

Anyways, in new developments, things have been going pretty slow right now. I have moved into the apartment with Matt as of a week ago and am still trying to get adjusted to a new schedule. Meanwhile, I am meeting with my intercambios and those are going really well. I really believe I am making some good friends out of these intercambios and just sharing life with these Spaniards. Pray that I will be able to write songs, find venues and muster up the courage to perform my songs in local venues. Until then, take care and God bless.

2007-07-05T14:41:00.000-07:00

This is Your Life....Are you who you wanna be?

Three years ago, Switchfoot released a song called This Is Your Life on the album, The Beautiful Letdown. The song talks about how we base too much of our lives on what already has occured. It talks about how today is the day to start being who you want to be. The question is this:

This is your life...Are you who you wanna be?
This is your life...Are you who you wanna be?
This is your life...Is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When your world was younger and you had everything to lose.

This is a question that crosses my mind and I ask myself over and over again. Am I turning into the person that I want to be? A person that makes God smile and makes him proud? A person that in everything I do, brings glory and honor to Him? Is this life everything that I imagined it would be?

My answer is absolutely without a shadow of a doubt. I couldn't be happier than where I am right now in life. I have been blessed with a wonderful opportunity here in Spain, a great team, family and friends along the journey that can share in this adventure that I am on in life. I feel as if I've already changed so much these past couple of months and it's only been three months here. This mystery known as life is exciting. I don't know what it holds, but it's going to be exciting to find out.

So I leave you with the question I ask myself everyday....This is your life, are YOU who YOU want to be? Is this life everything you dreamed it would be? Or are you letting history repeat itself? Are you letting your past defeat you when it is done and over? Today is the day to live the life that you choose to live? What will you choose?

I miss this guy....

2007-07-04T03:36:00.000-07:00

The Return From ACM

I was in Lisbon, Portugal last week from the 25-29 for our company's meeting there. If you ever get the opportunity to visit Lisbon, please do. It's a beautiful city to visit, very relaxed, and pretty cheap compared to other places in Europe. It was good to see old friends as well as make new ones while there.

That being said, as much as I enjoyed Lisbon, God really reinforced in me the need for spending time with Him daily. For most of the time, I felt so drowned out and was so quiet while there, just enjoying listening to everyone else around me. I really do believe that my times with God have taught me how to be a better listener to not only Him, but to other people around me. It felt so weird and awkward the days I didn't do my quiet times and I was fearful of that, but it is a good and healthy fear. Here's a pic of me and some of my WE family:

Rockin at the Palace...

So the band's concert at the Palace Bar went really well. The group said they had more fun here in Barcelona and it should be the truth. I live in the best city ever. The group was amazing and even went out and talked to others that were at the bar and not just sitting with their group. I can definitely see the Father raising up a great army for him in the future.

I think the thing I learned the most from this was that sometimes, God works things way bigger than I could ever imagined. I was so fearful that there was going to be nobody at the bar that evening for the band and that they would be disappointed. That night, the bar was packed full of people and it was like God saying to me "Does this work for you?"...lol. I was humbled that God was able to show me to never underestimate what He can do.

I will post more pictures of myself as soon as I can.

As for right now, things are just busy, busy, busy. Pray for peace and for me to be filled with the Spirit everyday that I am here. It's hard to believe that I am closing in on three months being here. God has proven faithful every step of the way here and I praise Him for that. Until next time my friends...

Go on and take My picture
Go on and make Me up
Oh, I'll still be your Defender
And you'll be My missing son
And I'll send out an army
Just to bring you back to Me.
Cause regardless of your brothers' lies,
Oh, you will be set free.

Because I am My beloved's
And My beloved's Mine;
So, you bring all your history,
I'll bring the bread and wine.
Then we'll have us a party
Where all the drinks are on Me
And as surely as the rising sun
Oh, you will be set free.
- Lover by Derek Webb

2007-06-22T05:00:00.000-07:00

So I have officially begun intercambios this week with Spaniards. For those of you who don't know what an intercambio is, it basically means an exchange in Spanish. For me, it's where we meet with a Spaniard and I practice my Castellano (fancy word for Spanish) and they practice their English with me. I will have to say that the meetings have been pretty solid so far.

I am beginning to become good friends with two people by the name of Joan and Sergio. They are both really interesting people and very thoughtful and compassionate people. I value their opinions and them as individuals. Lift them up, that they would have great days ahead and that God would bless them at their work. Lift me up in hopes that I will be able to be a good friend to them and be able to live life the way I should in front of them.

As for me, I'm doing so wonderful. I have a great time, great family, great friends (both Spaniard and American). God is teaching me so much of myself that's true and so much about myself that I need to change. I've realized that in some ways I've exchanged truth for tradition instead of tradition for truth. God is really molding me according to 1 Corinthians 13 and is truly showing me what true love is all about in life.

"Now, for the loss I bear his name,
What was my gain I count my loss
My former pride I call my shame
And nail my glory to His cross."
- I Boast No More by Caedmons Call

2007-06-18T06:51:00.000-07:00

I was recommended to listen to this artist by one of my best friends, Daniel Shippey. This is a song by Sean McConnell and it's called I'm Mady In Love With You. These lyrics have moved me in an awesome way. They seem so beautiful and as something that only God can say to me or to all of us. God bless everyone!

I see you down there everyday
Trying to find a different way
To build some kind of latter to the sky
Trying to find someway to see
The secrets of eternity
And they don't come all at once
And you don't know why

How do you think it feels to hear you screaming out my name
While all the while I'm trying to open up your heart
I see you when you're cry yourself to sleep
It's tearing me apart

I know you wish you could see
But that's the way it has to be
Someday you will understand
But don't you lose your faith in me
I know you wish you could hear me
Sometimes it's so hard to do
But every morning sunrise says
I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you

I know that you're waiting for
A chance to come in from the war
If only a moment, If only a day
A place where you feel safe and warm
A sanctuary from the storm
Until all of these questions fade away

But I cannot count all of the signs that you've passed away as mere coincidence
And I'm running out of ways to break through
But like a lonely lover waiting by the ocean
I'll never give up on you

I know you wish you could see
But that's the way it has to be
Someday you will understand
But don't you lose your faith in me
I know you wish you could hear me
Sometimes it's so hard to do
But every morning sunrise says
I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you
Yes, I'm madly in love with you

2007-06-17T16:20:00.000-07:00

"So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love."

O dear God,
I pray that I never forget this verse in my life. That no matter how many words I say or songs that I sing or songs that I write, I am bankrupt without love...That no matter how much I know, how much I learn, or how much I teach, I am bankrupt without Love...That no matter how many concerts I do, how many bands I promote, no matter what example I live, I am bankrupt without love. I can possess every Spiritual gift in the world but if I do not have love, I am completely and utterly worth NOTHING.

Therefore, God, since you are love, if I don't have you, I am nothing as well. Help me realize that in order to be like you, I must do everything in love.

2007-06-16T09:57:00.000-07:00

The Attack is On.

It seems as if lately, the evil one has decided to up his attack on fellow believers in other countries. I have heard from many friends in other places and as well as people back home that have told me about people going through such immense struggles and trials. It's sad to hear, but at the same time it's a great opportunity in that the Lord has found us faithful to go through many trials for the sake of His name.

This continually reminds me how there's almost a comfort about going to church in America. A comfort that puts out the subliminal message that to be suffering is to not be in God's will almost. This is so contrary to what it says in His word. God never promised us that we wouldn't suffer, but he did promise us that He is good and that He will always be with us. I encourage each of you that when you face persecution of suffering of any kind, realize that the Lord is with you through these trials. Things will be difficult, but God doesn't bring us to something without bringing us through it. We just need to have a kind of faith that has feet (thanks Dan-O for that line).

2007-06-14T10:29:00.000-07:00

So I am reading through Matthew and I just got through reading about Jesus being betrayed by Jesus. In that chapter, Judas asked the Pharisees how much they would pay him if he were to hand over Jesus to them. Of course we all know that he hands over Jesus for thirty pieces of silver. Now first of all, betraying Jesus for any kind of money is dead wrong and you know we always frown upon Judas when we read this. Jesus himself said "Woe to that man. For it would have been better for him to have never been born."

After reading this, I got to thinking in my own life what I've traded over the Lord for. I can recall so many times in life I've traded him for human friends, for music, for money or for respect amongst other people. I've even traded time with him for good things like doing tons of relief work or giving money to good causes. We as human being tend to trade him for things that are so tangible and for things that will give us some recognition amongst mankind. We always seem to forget the verse "What is seen is temporary; but what is unseen is eternal." Are you trading the best thing-our relationship with the Lord- for good things? Are you trading what is seen for what is unseen? Remember that Jesus said "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe."

And now for the funny story of the week:

My teacher was asking me about the Camino De Santiago and what was my favorite part. I told her that "I really enjoyed this one place we stayed at called Sobrado de Dos Monxes. There, we stayed at a monastery and we stayed with monks."......Or so I thought I said in Spanish. Immediately I get all these weird looks from people and I quickly found out what I said. Instead of saying I stayed with monks in Spanish, I said I slept with monks. So that was my first language goof up since I've been here. I thought I would share that one with you.

Favorite lyric of the moment:

I know you stay true when my world is false
Everything around's making time for chaos
I will see you when my sight is lost
Everything around's making time for chaos
- Chaos by MuteMath

2007-06-08T05:46:00.001-07:00

So I tried the Banana Java Chip Frappucino at Starbucks. The first time the robust beverage of banana and chocolate chip hit my mouth, I thought it wasn't too tasty. Then the second swig was amazing. So if you ever get the chance to have one, please do because it is wonderful, especially when you live in a place where it's 85 degrees with no air conditioning. I know some people are in worse conditions than I am so I guess I can't complain about that.
Yusi loves to tell me "you're always sleeping." I've gotten to where when he comes in, I'll lay down and pretend I was sleeping just to hear him say that to make me laugh. I'm going to go check out his new flat that he got sometime soon. He wants me to come and check it out so I think I definitely will do that.

This is my absolute favorite comedian ever named Jim Gaffigan doing a stand up about Hot Pockets...Check this out because this is hilarious:

2007-06-07T11:09:00.000-07:00

Something has got to give. I feel so much pressure to learn a language, learn a culture, get my residency AND find a venue for a band. It's probably more self-induced pressure than anything, but something has to happen sometime soon. I guess what I'm saying is I just need some prayer for something to work out.

I've realized today though that one problem I have is that I always feel like I am a burden to people and a bother to people. I need to figure out why I think this way. I'm thinking maybe it may have to do with what I've always perceived. I don't know if it's a self-esteem thing or something else. I even didn't want to put up this negative post because I didn't want to burden anybody by putting it up.

Later peeps...

The only time I ever noticed my heart
Was when I noticed you
- Noticed by MuteMath

2007-06-06T05:48:00.000-07:00

It seems lately that God has been teaching me a lot about forgiveness. I've discovered as receiving forgiveness, you can only receive complete forgiveness from the Lord for the things you do. However, it is important you go to the other person and admit that you've done them wrong and ask them to forgive you. After that, I believe that you are basically made right in the eyes of Christ.

I've also figured out that the only thing that unforgiveness of a person can get you is more pain and grief and more division between you and the Lord. We hold unforgiveness because we think "I want them to experience the pain that I experienced or am experiencing." In the end, if that person has asked for forgiveness from you and you still have unforgiveness towards them, the only one that's in pain is yourself. You're causing a division between you and Christ and that's where the real pain lies. Pain does not occur between two people, but rather the worst pain is when there's a rift between you and the father.

More importantly, I've learned how much I need mercy and grace in my own life in this area. Grace is getting what we don't deserve and mercy is not getting what we do deserve in our lives. I'm sure there are people in my life that have been unforgiving towards me and there use to be people in my life that I had harbored unforgiveness for. Trust me when I say, it's better to forgive them and move forward then to sit there and sulk on the fact that your feelings are hurt or that person screwed you over. That does no damage to the other person....It only does damage to yourself.

Let's just say that you do inflict damage on someone else and you hurt someone else. Is that what God would want you to do? That because you hurt, you wish to inflict pain on someone on else? Is it just me that sees something incredibly wrong with this way of thinking? Instead of hurting someone in response to being hurt, respond in kindness. Anybody can hurt someone in response to being hurt, it takes a different person to respond with kindness. "Do not overcome evil with evil, but rather overcome evil with good." That's a verse I'm guilty of not practicing as well.

2007-06-04T06:49:00.000-07:00

For my blog today, I wanted to put up this song that I recently heard. The words are written from a musician that just recently became a believer. It's called Jesus Christ by Brand New. I'm starting to think I should ask the questions in my own faith that I've been taught never to question. I'm really having to learn to decifer between the truth and tradition. While it is enlightening, it's scary at the same time because a part of me wants to believe the tradition is truth.

Some people may find it offensive, but I find it incredibly raw and real. Enjoy

Jesus Christ

Jesus Christ, that's a pretty face
The kind you'd find on someone that could save
If they don't put me away
It’ll be a miracle

Do you believe you're missing out?
That everything good is happening somewhere else
With nobody in your bed
The night is hard to get through

And I will die all alone
And when I arrive I won’t know anyone

Jesus Christ, I’m alone again
So what did you do those three days you were dead?
Because this problem is gonna last
More than the weekend

Jesus Christ I’m not scared to die
But I’m a little bit scared of what comes after
Do I get the gold chariot
Or do I float through the ceiling

Or do I divide and pull apart
Cause my bright is too slight to hold back all my dark
This ship went down in sight of land
And at the gates does Thomas ask to see my hands?

I know you're coming in the night like a thief
But I’ve had some time, O Lord, to hone my lying technique
I know you think that I’m someone you can trust
But I’m scared I’ll get scared and I swear I’ll try to nail you back up
So do you think that we could work out a sign
So I’ll know it's you and that it's over so I won't even try
I know you're coming for the people like me
But we all got wood and nails
And we turn out hate in factories

2007-06-03T04:32:00.000-07:00

I'd Like to Present You With Something I Call Personality

I've realized that as I learn more of the Spanish language here, my personality has completely changed in a lot of ways. First off, it has taught me to listen more and to speak less. Not only because I'm afraid to make mistakes, but because I find it more beneficial to hear what my Spaniard friends have to say and I learn a lot from them as well. My Spaniard friends are funny, opinionated and a joy to be around. Just when I think I'm tired of Spaniard culture, they say something funny to me and I realize "I love these people so much."

However, I've also thought about this...Is a change in personality like this really so bad? Do we wish that we knew the language so quick to show "Look at me" or do we want to know the language fast to show "Look at Him?" I think we want our personalities to come out and have the ability to state what's on our minds and be funny. However, I think the beautiful thing about being a child in a language is that it teaches you to listen a lot more to the person that is in front of you. That being said I am reminded of the verse that says "Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." So instead of saying we've lost our personalities because of a lack of language acquisition, how about a gaining of the ability to actively listen to people?

2007-05-30T15:33:00.000-07:00

If Seeing is Believing, then Believing is Not Like Faith

I think we all need to remember in our lives what it says in Hebrews 11:1. That living the Christian life is not about playing it safe and living a life of comfort. It's about living a life that's holy and pleasing to the Father. It's about taking risks that may hurt us, but in the end, can only draw us closer to Him in our lives. Sometimes, our earthen vessels have to be put in the fire and last time I checked, fire hurts sometimes. But in the end, we come out the way the Father would have us to be...and that is more like Christ.

I am more and more fascinated by the life of John the Baptist in the scriptures. Jesus said that he was the greatest man ever to be born of a woman. John the baptize was a wild man and a man of risk and of great faith. The man ate locus and drank honey and had camel skins as clothes. Last time I checked, Gucci and Armani didn't have a special deal on Camel Skin three piece suits and Locus wasn't on the menu at Wolfgang Puck's restaurant. This man was a man of great faith and totally depended on the Lord. He totally depended on the Lord for everything in his life.

I pray constantly that I would be a man of wild passion and of wild faith for Him in my life. That I would not just sit on the sidelines of this life, but that I would get in the game of life and play it with all my heart. I pray that when I do get knocked down, that I will keep getting back up and press on towards the prize that awaits me. That I will follow hard after Him!

When will we as a depraved generation completely rely on the Lord and not on our own abilities? When we will be fully obedient to what he's called us to in our lives? When will we realize that no matter how many degrees or high honors we have in life, that we are nothing without Him in our lives? When will we realize than in a world of iPods, Starbucks and google, that God is the only one that will satisfy our desires? When will we realize that true joy comes from who you are in Christ and not from who you are in the eyes of humanity?

You play it safe that's why you're running away
You play it safe because you think it's okay
- Play it Safe by Dizmas

2007-05-27T04:50:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness is Divine

This saying is so true in every aspect of it. After learning so much about grace in my own life, God brought me to the next facet of grace, which is forgiveness. I know for myself personally it's easier for me to forgive others than it is for me to forgive myself. I am so hard on myself and when I do that, I end up doing worse and being more sinful in doing that.

I was sitting today and God just revealed to me how I do this time and time again. Today I forgave myself of a lot of things I have done to myself and to others that have been in my life. That was the most freeing thing I've experienced in a while.

I've also learned how to let go of others that mean a lot to me in my life. I let go of them because I love them and only God knows what they need in their lives. I just pray that the Lord will bless them and that they will continue to stay on the straight and narrow. I truly love everyone that I've shared life with and experienced things with in life. Thank you God for everything in my life. I'm so thankful.

2007-05-21T12:31:00.000-07:00

Today I've been really thinking about the idea of what was written in the song "How Deep The Father's Love For Us:"

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer

We as believers (especially Americans) think we are entitled to so much. We can have anything to our liking. You can have you computer designed to your specifications, you can have you car with or without a DVD player...you can even have your thick steak cooked anyway you want with any side you want. The sad thing is we have the same mentality with the friends we want to have or how we want to have them. We sometimes want certain people to be our friends and expect for them to be a certain way.
These past couple of weeks I've been struggling with the fact that I may not save a lot of money while I'm here in this beautiful city that I love so very much. Then I got to thinking about "Why should I gain from His reward?" Who says I should save anything from this trip? Who says people should be the kind of friend I want them to be? Certainly not the Lord.
My point is that the greatest reward that we can gain from this was said in the Cateqisms "What is the chief end of man? To glorify God and enjoy Him forever." The ultimate reward as a believer is to be able to glorify the Lord and enjoy Him and experience Him. Human beings are going to do what they are going to do, but the Lord will never fail us. He has always been the friend, father, Lord and King that I've always needed in my life. The people he puts in my life are there either for a reason or for a season. The ones that are there for a reason, I need to hold on to them until the Lord shows me it's time to let go. Until next time peeps.

Caleb and Lindsey have two children named Jonas and Meredith. I love them both so much. Today, Meredith reached out to me for me to hold her, which made my day and week. I got to hold her for a long time and it was such a joy to do so. I get so much joy from the Lord in the midst of Children. I also learn more from them than I do from adults sometimes. The messages they teach us are so simple and yet so true.

2007-05-19T03:32:00.001-07:00

Here's one of my favorite comedy groups called Flight of the Conchords. If you like dry humor, you'll love this:

2007-05-18T03:10:00.000-07:00

I hope you enjoy this song and who knows...you may even buy the song and this may apply to you right now. If it does, I encourage you to never run away from struggles and suffering, but to face them head on and give them to the Lord. The Lord doesn't bring us to things without seeing us through them. I constantly have to remind myself that the Lord never promised a life without suffering, but He promised that He is good and that He is with us. To that, I say Amen Jesus, my Lord, my God, my Savior, my friend, and most importantly, my King.

God, my God, I cry out
Your beloved needs You now
God, be near, calm my fear
And take my doubt

Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
Of the mountains I can’t climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
Of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
Of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

God, my God, let Mercy sing
Her melody over me
God, right here all I bring
Is all of me

‘Cause You are and You were and You will be forever
The Lover I need to save me
‘Cause You fashioned the earth and You hold it together, God
So hold me now

- I Will Lift My Eyes by Bebo Norman

2007-05-17T02:22:00.000-07:00

This next picture goes out to a special woman in my life, even though this note is about 4 days late:

I love you mom. God knew what he was doing when he blessed me with a mother like you. You've sacrificed so much so that Mike and I can have our dreams come true. You've been the example of how a parent should be for their children. I know I've embarrassed you a little with this note, but I want the world to know how much you mean to me.

2007-05-16T10:39:00.000-07:00

The Camino De Santiago

As I sit here in the cafeteria of my residencia, I am reflecting on the 75 miles of backpacking with my team the Camino De Santiago de Compostela through the beautiful green pastures filled with sheep, cows and horses in the area of Galicia in Northern Spain. From beginning in Lugo to the end in Santiago de Compostela and every town along the way was a lesson learned.
The Camino of Santiago, known in English as the walk of St. James, is the path in which James, the disciple of Jesus, walked through Europe sharing the good news with people he came in contact with. Since the discovery of his body in Santiago, the Camino has been used by Catholics as a way of penitents of sins. Priests would tell their people to walk a certain part of the trail for remission of sins. Today, the trail is used commercially and some people still do the trail as a spiritual journey for a week or for the whole trail, which takes 36 days to do.
I specifically think about the highlights of the adventure, the people I met along the way or that I got to know and the sights that I have seen along the way and am just amazed by the love of the Creator of the universe.
Out of the six days there, my most memorable were the first, second and last day of hiking and they were probably the most physically draining of the days. The first day we ended up almost going in circles and walked for 8 hours of the day instead of only 4 hours. We were on a path for about 3 hours that if we had continued to stay on it, we would have ended up back in Lugo. We walked on a stretch of highway with the sun beating down on our bodies and nowhere to get water for miles. This being my first backpacking experience, I prayed "Lord, there's no way I can do this for 4 more days. In my weakness Lord, be my strength and help me to delight in that."
We finally got to the destination of Friole and my calves were the sorest they've ever been and I was thirsty and exhausted. Matt told me he thought they had killed me as I layed in the fetal position in the Pensíon. Here, we met a lovely old couple from Western France who had the same experience we did on the first day as well. Along with that, the husband injured his foot so they were having to take a taxi the next day to Melide to get it looked at. The wife was so delightful and fun to talk to.
The second day we hiked 15 miles to Sobrado Dos Monxes, where we stayed at a MONASTERY! It was amazing to stay in a place that was rich in thousands of years of history and such a place of wonder. The man that checked us in there was so nice and caring. Heck, everyone in Sobrado was nice and caring. The last day was rough and humbling as it rained all day in our final push to Santiago. It was rainy, windy, and cold all day and boy was I ever in a bad mood all that day. It was one of those days where I wish that I wasn't so convicted by God to not use four letter words. I could have easily said every wirty dord in the book that day. However, the last hour push to the city was nothing but blue skies as we reached the Cathedral of the Apostle James.
So what did I learn from this experience? All I know is that this experience has left me different than I was before I left. I have learned what it means to grant grace to others because now I've learned to grant grace towards myself when I screw up. I almost forgot that there's nothing I can do to be saved and that I am only saved by the grace of God in my own life. I was just walking today to our team meeting and I realized I forgot my camera. Instead of beating up on myself, the Lord said "there's nothing you can do about it now. Don't beat yourself up and just know that my grace is sufficient for you. You have never been able to earn my love and you never will. All I ask is that you accept my gift of grace and love...that's all."
Think about this trip, I am also reminded of the 23rd Psalm when it says

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
He maketh me lie down in green pastures
He leads me beside still waters
He restores my soul

This journey truly has been one of spirituality for me. I will take everything I have learned from this experience and with it, my life will never be the same ever again. Thank you, Lord, for this moment that you blessed me with. I will never forget it ever in my whole life. I'm thankful for grace and mercy and for your love that you have freely given to me. I know there's nothing I can do to deserve it, but I joyfully accept it with all my heart. Thank you for showing me the way to show grace to others is to first show grace to myself.

Random lyrics that were in my head on the trip

He uses love like a bullet from a gun
She's careful like a surgeon
Everywhere he goes, they all know to run
But she can't help but love him.
- The L.A. Song by Dave Barnes

I am alive in this moment
In this moment, I am found
I am alive in this moment
In this moment, I belong
- In This Moment by Starfield

Life is beautiful
But it's complicated
We barely make it
We don't need to understand
There are miracles, miracles
- Life is Beautiful by Vega4

I will lift my eyes to the maker of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the calmer of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the healer of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to you
- I Will Lift My Eyes by Bebo Norman

Now it's picture time:

This is a picture of the cathedral at Lugo, our starting point

This is a church in the distance along the way

More pictures coming soon....

2007-05-15T12:21:00.000-07:00

So after 75 miles of hiking in Northern Spain, I am back. It was a great time of walking through beautiful pastures of green and small towns with good people, good food, and good times. I have learned so much on this trip that I would have never learned being in a busy city and having such a busy life here in Barca. I also got to really know my team on a deeper and more meaningful way. They're going to be my family for the next two years and I'm looking forward to getting to know them more and more.

I think the most important thing I have learned from this trip is just how valuable grace is in my life. I wouldn't be able to do anything to deserve the love that Christ has for me. It's only by grace that I have been saved. I have also learned to not be so concerned with human opinion, but rather who I am in Christ. I have been reinforced with the lesson that not everybody is going to like me and that's fine. I am also so thankful for the ones that do understand me and love me for who I truly am. I don't need to spend time trying to make people understand me or love me, that I just need to live the way God has me to live and he'll put people in my life that will be meaningful and challenging. (Disclaimer: I love my teammates as a whole a great deal and what they believe, I value in them as a person. Just wanted to be sure that they knew that... ;) )

More comments about the Camino coming soon...

Life is beautiful, but it's complicated
We barely make it
We don't need to understand
There are miracles, miracles

2007-05-07T02:07:00.000-07:00

2007-05-05T07:53:00.000-07:00

Well I went to get my residency today and I got the paper that says I have a place to live here, but I went to the gov't building and they said I wasn't in the system. How can I not be in the system and yet have a visa? Interesting...lol. Pray about that for me peeps because that has to work out if I am going to work here.

Last night I went out to dinner with a bunch of people from my residencia. We all had a good time being rowdy and laughing, yet enjoying life with each other. Pray for all of them and that God will bless them in their school.

Tonight, Matt, Charles, Chuck and I are going to see a movie which I hope to be the movie of the year...that's right...Spiderman 3. Matt and I were talking about the fact that it's either going to be an awesome movie or a complete flop. I guess we'll see tonight if it is going to be.

I was talking with one of the watchman here today and I noticed he used a verb tense which people don't use around here. I immediately knew where he was from and asked him. Sure enough, he's from Argentina! HOW AWESOME IS THAT?! The only negative thing he has going for him is that he's a River fan...I can live with that though.

Things are rockin here though...Thanks for the prayers and encouragement guys...Keep them coming.

Here's Anberlin in their song "Paperthin Hymns" off of the Never Take Friendship Personal album:

2007-05-03T11:04:00.000-07:00

Shawn McDonald (AKA Shawn McAwesome) and the song "Free" off of the Ripen Album....Will you enjoy? I think you will... ;)

2007-05-02T15:24:00.000-07:00

My spanish classes have been going well. I have two Swiss guys, 4 French girls, and one Brazilian in my class...they're all pretty cool people. The Swiss guys are relaxed and very easy going...my kind of people.

My roommate bought me ice cream two days ago. It was a double chocolate thing...Really good.

I'm beginning to feel apart of the family here at my resi. Pray for that the Lord will bless them on their exams, which are in June. They only have one exam in each of their classes for the whole semester...YIKES!

I've been doing a lot of walking here, which is great but tiring at the end of the day.

I will be gone all next week on a hiking trip called El Camino de Santiago De Compostela. We will hike about 15 miles a day for five days, which will be fun. Here's some of the things I will get to see:

Hiking in Europe...Never done that before.

2007-04-30T10:55:00.000-07:00

I wrote a new song today and it's a song about something I've been experiencing as of recently. I don't write many, but this is a song that I'm proud of. Will you hear it? I guess you'll never know...;) All I know is that song writing has been therapeutic in a sense for me as of lately. I want to write songs that anyone can relate to. I want people when they hear a song that I've written, to be able to put images of their own in conjunction with every word.

2007-04-29T17:34:00.000-07:00

Today, we discussed the idea of intentional as in relation to the bible and our lives as followers of Jesus. We discussed the ideas of what are some ideas of intentionality and what we thought intentionality means in our lives.

In my life, I would have to say intentionality is enriching those around you with truth and the Love of Jesus while keeping your focus on what it should be; that in hopes that one day that the enrichment of the gospel that you pour into them will show them they should turn to Jesus as their savior.

I left the study with the one question in my head, "Is what I am doing intentional towards the end goal or am I doing things with other intentions in my mind?" The bible says we have to take capture every thought and to test everything. I find myself constantly testing whether what I am doing is leading to the big picture, am I doing a bunch of random things for the sake of a project, or am I making a person a project in my own life?

Me and my boss discussed today that in your face sharing, we feel, treats people as projects and not as people. I feel the turn or burn philosophy has become an impersonal, condemning way of sharing the gospel with an individual rather than being what the gospel should be...and that is sharing life with people and welcoming in the sick and sore and wounded and sharing with them in their sufferings and showing them that there is a hope in this world.

Am I saying that you should not share your testimony up front and tell people that you are a follower of Jesus? Not at all! What I am rather saying is share your faith up front, but continue to share life with them and be a friend to them and wait on the Lord to provide you with opportunities to pour truth into their lives. The one challenge of this way of sharing is that it challenges you to live the example out instead of just saying a bunch of words or spiritually throwing up on people (gross visual image...I know).

The question I leave everyone is this. If you were on the other side of the fence, would you want to be treated as a project or a person? The choice is up to you. I'll leave you to answer that for yourself. My prayer is that people would stop sharing and then leaving, but rather sharing and then keep walking with that person or with the people.

2007-04-28T11:20:00.000-07:00

Today I did a whole lot of napping and recovering from the lack of sleep I've had the past couple of days. Things have been fun though for me and interesting all at the same time.

I bought a brown jacket from ZARA the other day. That thing cost me an arm and a leg to get...It was rediculous. Needless to say, this jacket I will be wearing for years and years.

Coffee here in Spain is so good. It's not that sweet Starbucks dessert coffee, but coffee in its purest form. I go for either the Café Cortada or the Café con Leche...Good Times.

I had some Milanesa tonight for dinner for the first time in 14 or 15 years. It brought back some good times growing up in Argentina. I also found out that there is an Argentine Steak place that is not far away from where I live... ;)

I'm beginning to learn that Spaniard people drop a lot of F-bombs, which is something different for me. They openly talk about sex and stuff along those lines here which is different. Needless to say, friendships here are a lot more open to discussions of a large variety of topics.

Here's some pictures of some other super cool buildings in Barca. All these buildings are no more than 5 blocks away from where I live...enjoy:

2007-04-27T15:45:00.000-07:00

Today was an a-mazing day. I went out with two of my friends to eat and the place we wanted to eat at was closed sadly. Instead we found another place to just get something to drink at. While there, I got to share my testimony with them. Pray for these two individuals, that I will be able to live out the life that the father would have to me to live in front of them so that they will want what I have in their own lives...that they will not see me, but see Jesus in me.

I also got to go see an American movie in Spanish called Sunshine...I understood most of it, which rocks. The movie, however, wasn't very good or realistic. So if you plan on seeing a movie, don't go see that one. I am bonding a great deal with the people here. Pray for them, that they will realize how much they need Jesus in their lives.

A good friend reminded me today at how much I don't want the typical American dream. We waste our time on so many things that don't matter in the scheme of eternity. When will America wake up to the fact that live is not about us as individuals, but it's about giving glory to God? I pray that we remember this in each of our lives.

I want to know what it's like when I say that it's God who saves and not myself. I think this adventure that I am on will teach me just that in my life. Things work very slowly here and it can be frustrating to some, but I see that as not only leading people to salvation, but at the same time it is enriching their lives and showing them that God's word is still applicable today in our lives. That it's not just a book of dusty old principles, but it's the living word of God.

Until next time Friends and Family.....

Oh can't you see what love has done to me?

2007-04-26T14:12:00.000-07:00

So I got asked by my friend at the resi today if I liked Bush. I told her I didn't like his foreign policy and his education policy. So I guess in a round about way, I didn't answer her question and yet I did answer her question.

Anyways, I opened up a Spanish Bank Account today and bought some hangers for my clothes. I know that sounds excited to all of you out there. Tomorrow I'm going to walk around my neighborhood and pray for it and also do a profile on the neighborhood as well.

Today was a fun and yet productive day. Next week I start my Spanish classes, which should be fun. I'll let you know how the weekend goes. Until next time people.

2007-04-25T15:34:00.000-07:00

Well today was another busy day...NOT! I met with Matt to buy fruit at the market and to buy the girls some roses in honor of the Day of Sant Jordi. We talked about assignments that we had going on. After that, I went with Haley to a non-profit meeting in which I almost fell asleep at the meeting. There's something about a comfortable chair in a warm room that makes me want to sleep.

After that, we met up with Matt and Aaron and had some Durum and patatas fritas and talked for a while about our plans for the weekend. It looks like a weekend of watching The Office and Heroes is in store.

One thing I learned today is that the people here are so full of life but don't like to talk about spiritual things a lot. I already love the people I live with and want to get to know them on a personal level. I hope I get to know them a little better during my time here. Until next time friends.

2007-04-25T04:03:00.000-07:00

Here's the pics of Barcelona I've promised...Dios te bendiga.

Typical buildings here in Barca:

A Bull Ring in Barca:

More high rises in barca:

La Sagrada Familia, a building designed by Gaudi and STILL not finished. Nevertheless, it's still beautiful..

2007-04-23T13:43:00.000-07:00

Well I moved in to my Residencia today and it has been good so far. My roommate's name is Jose and he's from Mallorca. I found out that he is a Boca Juniors fan as well as a Barca fan so we'll get along just fine...;) I think we're going to go see a Barca game together sometime soon. As for tonight, we're going to watch the movie 300. It will be in Spanish, but nevertheless it will be fun.

Here are some pictures of my residencia:

My Bed...

My desk...

The View from my room...

The closet space...

2007-04-22T17:28:00.000-07:00

Today was a great day. I got to go to a Church with Haley in which the service was entirely in Catalan and I even got to sing in Catalan a little. I got to introduce myself to the church and I got to meet the pastor and his wife as well. It was a sweet moment. Then, we went to this festival near the docks that was hosted by Oxfam. I got to have some Salteñas Bolivianas and Empanadas Argentinas, which were both so delicious. Then we went to the Park, where they were having an Earth Day celebration. Then I came back with Caleb to his place and I took a mad nap and took it slow till Supper time and worship with the team.

In worship, we talked about what the word blessing really means. I came to the conclusion that the word blessing means being filled by the Lord in our lives. Blessings cannot be measured in finding money or someone doing an act of kindness, but rather in the Lord filling us with His spirit on a daily basis.

Tomorrow, I move in to my residencia, where I will hopefully get to build relationships with some Catalanes and refine my Spanish a bit. I'm excited, nervous and scared. I know with all my heart that the Lord will be with me and will never leave me. Peace out peeps.

2007-04-22T00:00:00.000-07:00

- Some amusing differences between Spain and the U.S.:

1) You get no free refills on drinks in Spain.

2) Food portions are smaller here.

3) Things are more expensive here.

- I got my first Euros yesterday...it was exciting.

- I dreamed about the people from orientation...How I miss them.

- I love my team...they are great.

2007-04-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

So I have noticed that a lot of people here have dreadlocks and I have always thought that they were so cool. This being the case, I have decided to grow my hair out long and get dreadlocks. I am not going to get the big ones, but rather the small, neat looking ones. My mom would be so proud to hear that I'm doing this (I love you mom).

Today, I got to help escort a little old Catalan lady down a street, which my team tells me that it is rare to do something like that. She was 85 years old and such a sweet lady. I couldn't just leave her because I would feel like I was leaving my own grandmother. She asked me to go into a bakery with her, where she proceeded to buy me 13 euros (17 dollars) worth of cookies and sweets. She even invited me and my teammates to eat lunch with her at her home, but we graciously declined because we had work to do.

I still don't have pics of the city yet, but they will be coming soon...I promise.

2007-04-19T13:44:00.000-07:00

Well I have made it safely to Barcelona...It's one heck of a beautiful city...Beautiful beaches, great food, great architecture, but more importantly I can't wait to get to meet the people here.

Meanwhile, I have some pictures from my trip to the Georgia Aquarium (it's what I did the day before I left to come here to Barca).

2007-04-16T16:54:00.000-07:00

I officially have 48 hrs left before I leave the country for two years on my exciting new adventure...WOO HOO and HOLY CRAP all at the same time....lol. The feeling of "What am I doing?" has officially begun to kick in. I'm really excited, but at the same time kind of nerve wrecking. Did I mention that I hate packing?...lol

2007-04-14T16:26:00.001-07:00

Packing has never been so stressful before. How do you pack everything you need for two years in just three bags? It's craziness. However, I do have the two footlockers packed and am working on my suitcase.
I keep waiting for the feelings to hit me...the feeling of "HOLY CRAP! I AM MOVING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY FOR TWO YEARS! WHAT AM I DOING?!" I keep praying that it will just go ahead and hit me now so I can get my crying over with.

I will miss these people.....

2007-04-12T06:44:00.000-07:00

Well today I drive to Atlanta to spend the night with my brother and then fly to Miami and back tomorrow to pick up my visa for Spain (EXCITING). I'm so excited that the whole visa process has gone so well. It's definitely a blessing to have that go so smoothly. Looking forward to that adventure tomorrow. Another exciting moment is awaiting around the corner. ;)

2007-04-06T07:45:00.000-07:00

As I am back at my house on 2603 Camellia Drive in Tifton, GA, I am full of so many mixed emotions about things. It was hard waking up this morning and not waking up in my twin bed in quad 5B and not hearing Pey Pey greet me in the morning. It was weird not seeing Dan and us two just goofing off like we usually do. It was weird and sad not seeing my two best friends in club 9a again.
However, as I have been back in Georgia, I have come to really ponder what the word "home" really means. Me being the English type major that I am, I looked up the word Home in the dictionary. I came upon several definitions, but this one definition stuck out the most:

the place in which one's domestic affections are centered.

I miss my home...the place I spent 8 weeks growing with people that I grew to love so much and to be so comfortable around. The place where people got to see me at my best and at my worst. The place where people got to see the goofy side of me, yet the quiet side all at the same time. Virginia has been my home for the past 8 weeks.
However, my new home awaits in 2 weeks. I will get on a plane and head to Barcelona, Spain, where I will get to share life with people and get a chance to love people and be loved back all the same. I will get to experience the same things I did in VA.....happiness, laughter, sadness, pain, suffering, but most importantly JOY. I will learn there as well what it means to live by faith and not by sight...to hold unswervingly to the hope that I profess, and to know what it means when it says that love never fails.
To my friends in VA, I love you guys so much and think about you guys all the time and pray for you guys. To my roomie Pey Pey and my friend Dan, you guys are wonderful young men and I'm humbled that you guys love and respect me so much. To my friends in Quad 9, I love you all more than you'll ever know and more than any word I could ever say.
However, it's time for us to move forward. It's time to break camp and go to war where we are suppose to be. Go with your Armor and be barbaric and have faith, hope and love. Blessings to all.

2007-04-01T11:08:00.000-07:00

To go back from where I was would just be wrong...
I'm pressing on.

Shine on, Shine on
And on to something new
It's long and overdue
I will remember you
Shine on, Shine on
And let the others see
You've got your victory
Will you remember me?

Somewhere between the end
And the point where we begin

2007-03-20T13:37:00.000-07:00

I've learned that sometimes, you need to get out of your own way to let the best things in life just happen the way they're suppose to. Sometimes I am my own worst enemy and I am human and blow things out of proportion or get mad over silly things that in the scheme of eternity, do not really matter.

2007-03-04T10:05:00.000-08:00

Things have been amazing here. I can't put down all the cool stuff I am learning here, but I can say that it has been an amazing experience that I will never forget. I have made some great friends here that I love dearly. Just continue to speak to the father about everything that is going on here and pray that the Devil will not take hold of this place while we are here. Here is some pictures....Love you guys:

2007-02-25T11:34:00.000-08:00

2007-02-21T17:38:00.000-08:00

Well I am at training right now and having a blast with my fellow coworkers here, but can't wait to be on the field in Barca. Things are looking pretty awesome right now. Well that's it for now.

2006-12-28T11:20:00.000-08:00

Well so far the visa application process has been rather extensive. After 10 tries of calling the consulate, I finally got through and made my appointment to apply for my visa..(applauses are appreciated). After that, I called and got my certified birth certificate. The only thing left to take care of is the Apostille Certification for my police record and my medical check up.

So far, I'm over halfway done on the money needed for my trip, which is flippin sweet....I haven't even sent out my fundraising letters yet either. My computer and all the supplies I needed came in today, which is really awesome. the only thing left to get is Quark Xpress 7, which is turning out to be a royal pain in the butt. Everything else is going smoothly.

2006-12-06T06:36:00.000-08:00

Greetings everyone....This is my first post on this new blog. With this one, you'll be able to keep up with the process of me moving to Spain. I am pretty excited about it all happening. I have a lot to take care of, but I know it will all get sorted out soon. It's pretty exciting to be moving to a new place, even more a new country. I'm looking forward to being in Barcelona and can't wait.